Not in Asia anymore

President-Elect Obama

2008-11-07T12:30:00.010+07:00

I’m not much of a blogger as evidenced by my inaction on this site, but what better reason is there to write than President-Elect Obama? Anyway, please bear with my self-indulgence with this next post, and forgive my optimism—I just can’t help it.

[Written 11-05-2008]

So how can I write about this, genuinely, in a way that doesn’t echo all the noise of the pundits, news articles, and political blogs? What can I write that’s true? That really expresses the deep import of it all?

From the start of this year, I’d always said 2008 would be a big year—a year of big happenings and big changes. Why did I think this? I don’t really know… I guess because personally I was really ready for it, ringing in anticipation for it. My life was changing; my friends’ lives were changing around me; Taiwan (where I was living at the time) was majorly changing, the Beijing Olympics were coming up; the globalized markets bounced up and down like a yo-yo; and of course… there was the Election.

I know I have little to compare it to, but I feel in my gut that this decade, and this year in particular, marks a new and distinct direction, and it seems as if all of a sudden, a collective consciousness and mobilized will has gelled across the nation. 2008 is the new 1968.

On election night, I watched the results with my friends, some of whom I had canvassed with in Virginia a few times. In Ulah’s Bistro on U Street, cheers erupted at every Obama take. Maryland, New Jersey, Illinois, Pennsylvania. Tar Heels picked up a Senate seat with Kay Hagan. New Hampshire picked up a Senator too. Periods of electric enthusiasm peppered lulls of quiet(er) waiting and commercial breaks.

State after state announced results. CNN made projections, often—puzzlingly—only after 3%, 5% of votes had been counted. But hours after polls closed in Virginia, why wouldn’t they announce results in a state where so many of us had invested our time and hope? After polling so many points ahead, colored blue on so many electoral maps—could it be that Virginia would go red after all?

Waiting, waiting, waiting…

Michigan, Minnesota, New York, Ohio

Finally,

Virginia

51% Obama
49% McCain

(The final count puts Obama at 52% with a 5 point lead, but these were the results at the time of CNN’s projection)

Virginia goes blue! President. Senate. Governor

We scream scream scream! Turns out, all our efforts had amounted to something. What we did really mattered, and mattered all the more for the small margin and nail-biting finish.

We are the momentum of a sea change in America.

But that’s not all. After Virginia, we still wait. … but for what? It’s clear Obama will win… unless McCain wins California… and Oregon… and Washington… and all the states in between. Even so, we cannot leave. It’s not enough yet, and so we wait.

As the final polls on the West Coast close, we count down as one, not knowing why we are counting—but even this was a small part of belonging to a something big, and it felt good to do it.

5, 4, 3, 2, 1 …

OBAMA WINS THE PRESIDENCY!!!
11 PM EST

Shock!

So soon?!?

Jumping Screaming Hugging Crying

Our bodies cannot convey what we feel. They cannot move enough, do enough, release enough to express this great catharsis, months and months—maybe even years—in coming.

Jubilant, moved, and greatly relieved, everyone celebrates together. We’re strangers mostly, but tonight we are united and made familiar by hope and history.

We rush out onto the streets, grabbing, jumping, screaming, made heady with joy and relief.

We have taken back our country.

What we do matters. What we think matters. We have ownership of our democracy, of our government, of our country, of our future. We have taken back our country and things will never be the same. We will remember the power of our voices and move even greater mountains in the knowledge of this power.

There is nothing we cannot do if we try

That's the Way the Banana Peels

2007-05-16T21:08:00.000+08:00

So the other week, I went to get some scooter maintenance. At the shop, the proprietors started making conversation, and inevitably came the fascination/incomprehension of "Wait... you're Taiwanese, but you're American? You speak Chinese, but you really speak English?" etc. etc.

Now, the woman of the shop is very typically Taiwanese, and instantly claimed to understand the entire situation, in a friendly and inclusive way that nonetheless brooked no dissent.

"Oh! You're a banana. Just like my friend's niece!" (A banana, if you don't know is yellow on the outside and white on the inside).

Bingo! It's like my whole life suddenly became clear. It was so simple really. Then she continued to explain to me, very authoritatively, what that meant, what her friend's niece is like, what America is like, and how Chinese-Americans find and adapt to Taiwan. Apparently, sometimes they can't actually read Chinese, much less write the language (despite being Chinese--for shame!) and are quite helpless--practically little children who rely on the guidance of others, but at the same time making good money at English cram schools (by the way, how much money do I make anyway?). Essentially, it was concluded that her friend's niece and I must be the same person.

Anyway, after a long and amusing, if somewhat awkard exchange along these lines, my scooter was ready. On my way out, in the brusque Taiwanese manner of impressing gifts of food upon guests, friends, anyone you meet, the woman insisted that I take a bag of bananas with me. After all, I'd never had proper Taiwanese bananas like these before (she was sure). After the perfunctory 'no no, I couldn't, don't trouble yourself' routine I accepted the bag and promised to come back everytime my scooter broke down.

In the end, I decided there was a nice symmetry to this gesture. Now just to confound the issue a bit, these special Taiwanese bananas are larger than normal and--interestingly, they have these dark red-brown lustrous peels. But of course they are still white on the inside. Maybe this is all just to say, though they may be special and Taiwanese, but in the end, it's still just a banana.

It's Not All Fun and Games

2007-03-12T22:02:00.000+07:00

There are those moments in the classroom that you're just not really ready for, especially if, say, you're not actually trained as a teacher. Those expected roadbumps aside, there are definitely some cultural gulfs as well.

For example: Every Monday, I ask my kids what they did over the weekend. Today, one kid comes in and tells me that this weekend she went to her school (something people do often here on the weekends to use the fields and courts and things) with her dad and brother to play. Her dad was playing basketball with some other guys including a few high school students. One of the kids (18 yrs old) elbows him in the face and pisses him off, so her dad punches the kid (who is now on the ground) multiple times so hard that he breaks his own hand and has to go to the doctor. My student obviously thinks the whole thing is wildly entertaining, giggling through the whole story, expecting me to laugh, which I do not. I have a great poker face, but I couldn't help but be clearly disgusted. Basically, a 40-yr old man beats an 18 yr-old kid in front of his two children, and his daughter thinks the whole thing is funny and then justifies it to me by saying that her father was really angry.

The Taiwanese are truly unparalleled in healthy anger management.

My Tet in the 'Nam

2007-03-09T08:43:00.000+07:00

For those of you who didn't know--I spent Lunar New Year in Vietnam. I spent about 5-6 days in Ho Chi Minh, also known as Saigon, and about 5 days in Da Nang (China Beach) and Hoi An. It was an absolutely fantastic trip, and I don't really have the words for it. There are too many things to say and too many stories to tell that I don't think I'm going to try. Enjoy the pictures (sorry there aren't too many people shots--I was traveling alone for awhile), and I promise, next time we meet, I'll regale you in person. In the end, all you need to know is that you should go. Check the sidebar for pictures! And Chuc Mung Nam Moi (Happy New Year!) And that picture is of me squeezing into a tunnel in Cu Chi. It was small.

Welcome to the New Year : Holidays in Taiwan

2007-01-14T10:32:00.000+07:00

Since last time, I have three big events and three big albums.

(1) Christmas show at school.
This was an insane amount of work but it was also really really fun. It's the most arts and crafts and singing I've done in a long long time. I'm thinking... summer camp? And it had that feel too. Tons of fun for me and the kids. Also, I couldn't have been any prouder of my kids. They really delivered the kids and were absolutely fantastic. Check out the pictures--they were super impressive.

(2) Christmas itself was a minor production. It's not really celebrated in Taiwan, and I didn't have time off. In fact, I worked an extra 10 hour day that Saturday before (Christmas show). But, one really cool thing: Two guys from Chapel Hill came to Taiwan and stopped in Hsinchu to visit. I didn't know them that well before, but we had an awesome weekend, where I introduced them to the joy of Taiwanese pubs, country scooter rides, and the local hospital. Let's just say there was a minor scooter accident and a few stitches. Not to worry, it was cool. Health care in Asia is extremely efficient: minimal paperwork, wait time, fees--all the things health care should be. Though it was funny when the nurse looked at my friend Josh who had a gaping gash in his chin dripping blood and told me, "Please ask your friend where it hurts." Anyway, thanks for coming David and Marc! come again anytime. There's plenty of room.

(3) New Year's in Hong Kong--

don't know why I didn't think about this before I went, but Hong Kong was insanely crowded. Like... I've never known such a thing. We basically flew to Hong Kong to stand in lines for three days. You might think I"m exaggerating, but I promise, I"m only a little. Even for the actual countdown, we were in line. That said, Hong Kong was impressive in its social organization and cleanliness. Special Economic Zone is right--hardly mainland China. Anyways, it was a really fun couple of nights, and we met a bunch of er... overly-friendly Englishmen, Germans, French, a Swiss, and an awesome Filipino bartender. The view from the top of Victoria Peak is also too unbelievable for words and the pictures hardly do it justice. If you can... go to Hong Kong and see it for yourself. Just a word of caution--the lines are killer long.

OK--enjoy the pictures everyone! And hope 2007 is off to a smashing start for all of you.

Keeping up with the Joneses

2006-12-25T22:24:00.000+07:00

(Jackie's last name is Jones)

So my birthday has 3 chapters. We'll start at the beginning.

Chapter 1 --Taipei

We drank, we danced, we stumbled home. There are some great picture sequences including one where Andy keeps telling me to lick his tongue and I try desperately to push him away. Even better, is the 21 kisses I received from complete strangers in the club--count them, there should be 17 smooches from strangers and 4 from people I actually know.

Chapter 2 --Filipino Magic Raver Party Disco 2000

It seems like we always end up at the Flying Pig, which only happens to be the filthiest of expat bars. But on this particular Sunday, the Filipinos rented it for their only day off (Filipinos in Taiwan are a bit like indentured servants, but I don't think the labor movement's really caught on in Taiwan yet...). Anyways, long story short, we danced with a bunch of Filipinos as part of an elaborate good-bye to three foreigners leaving the same week. Opportunely, the Filipinos also sang me happy birthday. The picture is of me perched on Dave's shoulders watching the 'Sexiest Couple' Dance. It was pretty out of hand.

Chapter 3--Sida, 105

No birthday is complete without cake smashed in your face. This was my 3rd birthday cake in the space of 3 days (my adult class surprised me with cake and flowers, my boss bought one, and Sida bought one), which by any measure is a bit much, but I suppose I didn't eat much of the last one. And I got a sweet hat. This also marks the only time this teacher's gone out hard on a schoolnight...

All in all, this was the BEST birthday I've ever had, mostly because it's the only one where I've actually seen friends. In previous lifetimes, December 19th has always hit Christmas season and people scatter. But Taiwan doesn't celebrate Christmas so my friends here pretty much didn't have a choice.

Stay tuned for my Christmas in Taiwan. Our school put on a huge Christmas production, and I am immeasurably proud of my kids. On a more social note, 2 Chapel Hillians visit Taiwan, and I would like to say it was quite memorable. Let's just say that we all ended up in the hospital on Christmas Eve.

Jackie turns 24... er I mean 23... or is it 32?

2006-12-14T14:32:00.000+07:00

What a night. I had to string together 3 cameras just to piece together the whole story. Here are some excerpts from a drunken email Jackie wrote at 10 am the next morning… yes she was still drunk.

“I got a lot of cake in my face and then I ate it too.”

Jackie and I must have danced on the pole at the Flying Pig at least 4 times… and I’m pretty sure it was voluntarily. Same email, Jackie writes:

“my oroom mates are sleeping and I cna't lslepp, fuck those workds are spelled ewrong. fucking computer, type good ok ma…I may have had a microphone and the dancd flppr. What was I even doing? I definitely had a pole and I was defnitely dancin g on the pole, but i think I lost my new bracelet. it was here, with my arm, but where did it go?”

Also, Jackie took a full-on stage dive. Thank God it was onto Patrick’s back.

This weekend—let’s see if I can keep up with my own birthday celebration. Who knows, maybe I’ll speak in a British accent all night again… I learned all sorts of crude English slang that I’m told I should never repeat.

--Lastly, pictures are updated. I don’t even remember taking so many…

Tricks and Treats

2006-11-01T12:39:00.000+07:00

From left to right we are a blind man, a Fish Out of Water, Irish drag, and a jolly pirate.

Halloween weekend was epic. A sleepless weekend commenced on Friday evening at the much-anticipated house party. Incidentally, Ray and Danny’s is right by the cemetery and ‘mortuary park.’

Since there are only a handful of costume shops in town that really only cater to kids, there were quite a few repeats, but the standouts were the Moulin Rouge crew, Dave was the best one in drag there, Colonel Sanders was a nice touch, and Stephan was the only Viking with blood all over his foot and scooter (yep, that was another trip to the hospital).

As I was a fish out of water, I only thought it fitting to drink like one, and basically it was good time all-around. By the time the night was out, I’d misplaced my sweet hat, and the blue on my boas had rubbed off all over me so I was really more of a smurf than anything else. I was quite blue for a while… At the end of the night, Erin and Craig were kind enough to triple scooter me home, which under normal circumstances I’d consider dangerous…

The next morning at brunch, Jackie summed it up nicely when she noted that before we all knew it, it was already 4:30. Really, where does the time go? It’s weird, it is. Anyways, I’m missing a boa if anyone might know where it is. Or perhaps it flamed out when that tiki torch fell off the balcony and set my hair on fire…It’s alright, my hair was getting too long anyway.

Check Webshots for pictures from that night, my school's carnival with the kids, and then Tuesday night at Sida's.

Who invented the Roundabout?--Traffic in Taiwan

2006-09-28T15:03:00.000+08:00

Things I've learned while biking/scootering around:

1. All "right of way" really means is--don't get hit.
2. It's ok to drive the wrong way down a one-way street as long as you're facing the right direction and going in reverse. If you're on a scooter, even that doesn't matter.
3. It's ok to drive reverse anywhere.
4. If you bump someone or someone bumps you, it's ok to drive away.
5. If you're driving next to a bus, it WILL change lanes--so MOVE.
6. The right lane is the sidewalk.
7. Medians are only slightly bumpier than the shoulder, er, I mean the scooter lane.
8. A 50cc scooter can hit 90km/hr if you try really hard.
9. It's a good idea for pedestrians to wear helmets too.
10. It's ok to stop traffic to make a three-point turn.

Finally, un-traffic related--you know you're used to a place when it's 31 or 32 C (88 or 90 F) in your apartment and it's still not hot enough to turn on the air-conditioning. You only think I'm exaggerating.

**I've also posted pictures of my kids, and of the infamous farewell party. Although we can't remember it very well (In fact, I can't remember it at all), at least we'll always have the pictures.

Overcoming Language Barriers

2006-09-10T10:52:00.000+08:00

We have a strict no Chinese policy in our classes and so the kids come up with all sorts of ways to tell you what they mean....

On one of my last days with my baby classes (I've since taken on an adult ESL class and had to give my babies up), Titus, featured above, gave me one of those priceless teaching moments that convince you that real life is inifinitely more entertaining than movies and sitcoms and that these absolute little personalities are the best of the bunch.

He was all like-- Teacha Teacha my tummy is so ouch!
Me-- Titus, what's wrong? Do you need to go to the bathroom?
(Titus shakes his head)-- No, no. But Teacha, my stomach is so this! So ouch!
Me-- Well, Titus, I can't really do anything about it, but if you need to, you can go to the bathroom.
Titus: No Teacher, it's this

At this point, Titus squats down, holds both arms stiffly to his sides, and says, "Teacha I can't this"--squints up his eyes and lets out an extended grunt.

I about died. And then I told him he should eat more fruit.

Stay posted for pictures of all my A1 darlings. There are some favorites.

Snakes on Crack

2006-09-01T14:21:00.000+08:00

Seeing as how I'm a blogger now, I feel it's only appropriate to put in my two cents on Snakes on a Plane. Basically, if you haven't seen it, you really should. It's wildly entertaining, and fully deserves all the buzz it got and is getting. The whole sequence when the snakes start popping out of every crevice on the plane was glorious. The entire thing is deliciously ludicrous with enough nudity and gore thrown in to please anyone. It totally made me want to hop out of my seat and search for the nearest illegal exotic snake dealer. And I'd watch the movie again if movies in Hsinchu weren't $9 a pop. Unfortunately, at $9/ticket, I've only been able to watch the very best cinema has to offer: Miami Vice and Snakes on a Plane.

And then there was like a mighty plague

2006-08-28T21:51:00.000+08:00

So today, the powers that be decided to fumigate the city's sewers to get rid of the cockroaches that live in them. Rather than resign themselves to a poisoned suffocation, the hordes scampered out of the sewer grates, and it was like squishy. And that's really all there is to say about that.

A Tribute: the Taiwanese Turncoats

2006-08-17T15:12:00.000+08:00

Who are they? And whom did they betray?
Their names are Jim and Evan. And they have betrayed friendship.

Transitioning out of college is such a defining experience. All of a sudden you become small and adrift, bereft of the constant companionship you’ve been spoiled on. Now you’re only bound loosely through email and spotty phone calls to the people you’ve chosen for your family. The hectic structure of both academic and social deadlines suddenly abandons you, forcing you to learn solitude. Life in the place you left goes on like it did when you were still there, but the thing is, you’re not there anymore. You’re displaced—maybe geographically, but definitely psychologically. Friendship can really never be that easy again.

Before coming to Taiwan, I joked about how living, working and hanging out with the same handful of people all the time (Real World: Taiwan style) could either be really awesome or really disastrous. Fortunately, Jim and Evan—co-habitants of our double unit freshman-dorm- room-esque building—have mostly been awesome. They’ve done this before, and they’ve kept me company in my transition, seamlessly accepting and without request. So the following is a tribute replete with all sorts of pictures and quotes.

PS--I’m in the market for a Sunday crossword companion, an early morning bike riding/waffle eating buddy, and anyone with both seasons of Arrested Development on DVD.

Jim: I’ve seen the inside of Evan’s colon.
Evan: I didn’t mind the anus part.

Jim (who went to Catholic school for 10+ years): Obadiah is not a book in the Bible!
Me: Yea? You wanna bet?
Jim: YES.
-->People who lose, dance on poles

“You’re making me… warm. Back and forth. Forever.”

“You’re going to pull a muscle.”

Our resident guitar-playin’ and croonin’ sensations. Open night mike is horrendous without them. And they could take a scooter gang. Definitely.

Some closing trivia: Jim’s Chinese name is something akin to “Crossword Warrior” and Evan’s Chinese name is misspelled and tattooed on his back. They also both possess admirable roach and spider killing abilities.

Dear friends, you’ll be missed.

Also, if you don’t write or Skype me, I’ll send you angry emails and nasty Hallmark e-cards.

Beach Bum-bums

2006-07-31T00:14:00.000+08:00

A weekend or two ago, a group of us took a train down to a nearby beach. We floated frisbees in the salt-sticky air, munched on a most-potent gorgonzola, and took turns swigging Beaujolais straight from the bottle (classy style) while watching a marvelous sunset, all glimmering and gold. And then Jim got spanked by a Taiwanese man. There was some other stuff in between too.

Here’s some quick backstory: Jim and Evan are coworkers of mine who live downstairs (when I jump up and down in my room, Jim’s bed shakes, which is reason enough to jump), and they are thus my de facto companions. I hatch all sorts of plans and drag them with me. Sometimes they kick and sometimes they scream, but I know and they know that they are grateful. On this beach weekend, I also met Jackie, my sole female companionship on this rock (that is until Gaelic football practice starts), ergo she gets prime friend treatment as well. [Blogging has many benefits, one of which is self-sanctioned affectation evinced by words such as ‘ergo.’]

Anyways—we were all sitting at this beach bar getting viciously attacked by platoons of mosquitoes (I had no less than 35 bites on me in a span of 15 minutes, but thankfully the beer numbed it soon enough) and wondering if we could cozy up to the local Taiwanese crowd hanging out there. In my head, I could see us all enjoying a fabulously uproarious time of drinks and hearty laughs as we engaged in a natural and laidback cultural exchange—and maybe they’d want to share some of their barbeque grill treats with us too, seeing as all we’d had was Beaujolais and gorgonzola. Soon enough we capitalized on the whiteness of Jackie, Jim and Evan, and had edged our way in to a great acoustic campfire-style sing along of Bryan Adams, the Eagles, Eric Clapton, and other American acoustic adaptables. To test the grounds of our new friendship, I generously informed the crowd that Jim and Jackie wanted to join a live reenactment of a Taiwanese variety show-game (getting spanked with a fly swatter while people point, laugh and take pictures). Chinese comes in handy.

So Jim good-naturedly plants his feet and bends over, hands on the stone wall, back bent and concave, butt out—his very profile arched and straining in the grand mission of forging cultural bridges. Fly swatter in hand, Jackie gave Jim a few taps. However, the Taiwanese disapprove of Jackie’s gentility, and one man reaches over to show Jackie how it’s really done. With impressive skill and flair, the man exerts just the perfect amount of pressure and whip to make full use of the swatter’s natural pliancy, and man, you should’ve seen the instant recoil and look on Jim’s face. Five days later, Teacher Jim’s bum-bum was still tender and faintly blue.

We never did get to break bread with them, but the friendly locals did enthusiastically offer to take us to the best dog meat houses around. Our long and hilarious exchanges were periodically punctuated by one of the fellow’s friends coming over to tell us to disregard everything his buddy was saying because he was drunk. This was immediately followed up by another guy coming up to say that that guy was drunk, and then another and another. It was dizzying, slightly stomach-turning, but mostly just downright jolly. Everyone was accepting and happy. Instead of the usual mix of fascination and fear locals have of foreigners, they managed to be unassuming and genuinely curious without objectifying us in a way that welcomes you to take a load off and grab a cold Corona and then push your unsuspecting non-Chinese-speaking friends into chugging contests. When we left, they hollered for us to come back the next day, the day after that, and the day after that. Since we do have jobs and all, we haven’t been back yet, but I know when we do, we’ll have no problems picking up the fly swatter where we left off.

This is Sida

2006-07-25T21:06:00.000+08:00

This is Sida. He is genuine and kind and owns our favorite neighborhood haunt, Coffee 105. He was my introduction to Taiwan and the Taiwanese, so now he will be yours. The shop is in this tiny one-way alley, not three minutes from our apartments, and is a wonderful escape. My friends and I go there (Jim and Evan go daily) for an afternoon go at the crossword, Sunday “brunch” (cold noodles with cucumbers and spicy peanut sauce), and most of all, for the easy company of Sida and pals.

I love taking a book out there in the morning, and sitting at the high counter barefoot with the wooden floors and imported white sand underneath. Listening to Jack Johnson’s acoustic album and sipping a cold latte (which is excellent) with the “Windy City’s” breeze blowing by the open-air coffeeshop, you might think you were at the beach or a riverside veranda somewhere storied and ancient. That’s until you look across the street and see the rusted gate, bright blue with soured spots of red and brown, of the pay-per-hour parking lot, and then you remember you’re actually in Hsinchu, Taiwan, and that’s not so bad either. Next to the palm-lined canal downtown, the super-chill and convivial #105 is easily my favorite place in Hsinchu.

The first time I met Sida, not a week into my stay, we got to talking about my plentiful relations who just keep popping out of the woodwork with visits from out of town, early morning phone calls, and strange requests for me to edit their English. Hitting on the subject of an aunt who lives in Taizhong, a neighboring city, Sida invited me and Evan and Jim to go with him and friends to a night market there that weekend. And it was that easy. At a time when everything was uncomfortably new and dizzying and overwhelming, he promised to show me what the Taiwanese like to do, what’s fun, and most importantly what’s good to eat. He’s always ready with recommendations and frequently offers the use of his friends who are going places and who wouldn’t mind taking along a few waiguos (foreigners).

It’s his birthday this weekend, and we shall all party.

Stay tuned for the best beach day I've had in years. Just a few teasers: we had a gorgeous sunset, bonfires, sing-along time, and one unforgettable slap to Jim's tender arse.
See Webshots if you are impatient:
">http://community.webshots.com/user/dianaintaiwan